Sunday, November 9, 2008

College Days

I was just looking at pictures from my time spent at Life and reminiscing over how amazing that short season of my life was. It was there I truly learned to be independent, yet to rely upon others. That I learned how to forgive and how to accept the forgiveness the Lord had already granted me. I learned how to trust and move on, how to live and let live. I learned what true joy and happiness is, how to let loose and not expect anything more than the given.

If I could go back I don't think I would change a single thing, except maybe allow the season to last longer. I made lifelong friendships there and truly gained something from every person I came into contact with.

I am so thankful that the Lord allowed me the opportunity to leave everything I knew behind, to forge ahead and truly build a solid foundation upon him and him alone.

Monday, September 29, 2008

His Love is SO GREAT!

[John 3:16]
"for God so loved the world that
he gave his one and only son,
that whoever believes in him
shall not perish but have eternal life."
How is it that you can love me so much that you sent your precious baby boy to die a brutal death just so we could spend eternity together? I can't fathom that kind of love. It blows my mind that in the midst of all I am; that through all the me and muck and mire you chose me. Not just to serve you or bring glory to your name, but to love me. How can you cherish me? How can you desire me? How can you adore me? You have plans for me, dreams for me, purposes for me. Will I ever truly grasp hold of the immensity of your love for me? Of the absolute kindness of your thoughts towards me? Of your excitement concerning me? Lord, that's what this is really all about, isn't it? A lifelong romance. May I feel you romancing me. May I see it in everything you place around me. You're so amazing God! May I never lose an ounce of awe in how awesome is your love. You loved me before I even knew your name. You chose me to be your precious bride before I even considered accepting the offer. You daily send your loving glances my way. My longing for belonging is solely satisfied in your embrace. How great is my God and how worthy to be praised for my worship is nothing less than my utter adoration for you leaving my lips. May the world understand how much I love you for daddy, I truly love you.

Sunday, September 28, 2008

Theme Song of the Moment

Desert Song

this is my prayer in the desert
when all that's within me feels dry
this is my prayer in my hunger and need
my God is the God who provides

this is my prayer in the fire
in weakness or trial or pain
there is a faith proved of more worth than gold
so refine me Lord through the flame

i will bring praise
i will bring praise
no weapon formed against me shall remain
i will rejoice
i will declare
God is my victory and he is here

this is my prayer in the battle
when triumph is still on its way
i am a conqueror and coheir with Christ
so firm on his promise i'll stand

all of my life
in every season
you are still God
i have a reason to sing
I have a reason to worship

this is my prayer in the harvest
where favor and providence flow
i'm know i'm filled to be emptied again
this seed i've received i will sow

I have come to realize

That this life is not at all what I ever expected it to be, and I'm so happy about that. How often do we limit what the Lord can do by making plans that only fulfill our own desires? Yet, when we allow him to take absolute control he is able to do what he does best, create us into what he intended for us to be. I was created to be a light, an inspiration, a guide for Christ. And while I may not be getting towards his plans in the way that I first desired, this journey is so much more than I ever could have dreamed. I have an amazing husband, an amazing job, and an amazing church. What more could a girl ask for? My God is the God who provides, and he's proving that now. He's providing for me financially, emotionally and spiritually in ways that would seem impossible to the world and that's so exciting. I want to be used to prove that anything is possible with God. I want to be an example. I want to be so much more than what I feel I am now.

Take me to the next level. I don't always feel ready for it, but it truly is my heart's desire. Mold me and shape me, bend me and break me. I'm not satisified, I'm greedy and I want more. More of your presence and more of your love and more of your embrace. Here I am saying here I am Lord, send me!